i slept at 12am yesterday so that i have enough energy
to go to bt.gombak to find him.
i woke at 8am though im really very exhausted & having a migraine.
i wanted to show him that on his 1st yew gieng,
im there to give moral support
though i DO NOT believe & DO NOT understand his religion.




it was supposed to be a happy day for me.
being able to get an off day & going down to see him.
but he don't appreciate it at all.
the feeling i get when i reach the place is,
he finds me a pain in the neck, a nuisance.
i just sat there quietly & though i used to demand
alot of attention from him,
i didn't today.
i know he's busy but he still finds me a 'busybody'?




wtf?
since you think im troublesome
why did you even ask me to come?




after yew gieng,
we went back home to take a bath & freshen up.
he waited for me & fell asleep.
when i got ready i nudge him awake.
apparently he got up on the wrong side of the bed
& was very grouchy & he threw his temper at me
for no fucking reason.




i can't tolerate this kinda nonsense.
i had given in to him at bt.gombak when he flare up at me
for no fucking reason.
& now again & again?




so he told me not to go anymore.
disappointed but what can i say?
he's not changing his god-damn attitude
& he expects me to change my temper?




hey,
you've fucking crossed the border.




he just called minutes ago & asked if i wanna go over now.
please la, what's the time already?
you don't have to go to work tomorrow i have to.
i spent 6days in a week working 10hrs every day.
& on that 24hrs rest day for me,you had to make me angry/upset.
& since you've told me not to go over
for what fuck you called & ask me if i wanna go over now?
the dinner is over.




you only apologise when i ask you
& your apology is in sms form.
i want a face-to-face apology but you always took a long time
to even figure out you're in the wrong.
but even if you've figured it out,
you won't apologise until i ask you about it.
& i know you won't apologise to me infront of others.
your ego is too big to put down.
1word-sorry, has no meaning to me anymore.
no sincerity. no changes. not much hope left in me.



let's just see,
how long you can keep me.
i'm ready to turn around & never look back at you anymore.
but you asked for a chance repeatly.
now you have your chance, are you gonna blow it away again?




that's just so you,
coming back when i've already moved on.